break or hope

To break or to have hope?
A question with which I can't cope 
He smiles, he is happy 
But the reason makes me unhappy 
The reason for his happiness isn't me 
I let him be completely free 
But this, its going too far 
I feel less than par 
I want to be the reason behind his smile its been more than a while 
If it wasn't meant to be 
Shouldn't I have been over he? 
So deep down I've fallen 
its as if my soul has been stolen 
I'm trapped where joy seems like a crime 
I feel like a sad artist of mime 
Can't open up or else I'll break 
All I need is not to be fake 
But how does one fake without falling apart 
its broken you know, The heart